Mimi Rothschild Brings You"God’s Love Shown Through One Baby Girl
Wednesday, 28 April 2010 11:51
|Mimi Rothschild Brings You
I was married at the young age of 18 and began my family before that. I tell most people that I loved life so much I that I hurtled right over into it. By the time I was 19 I was expecting my second child and I could never be happier. It all happened so fast that it takes me a minute just to remember the details. It is time for my husband and I to go to the doctor and I am so excited they plan on telling me what sex the baby is. I am sitting in the waiting room with anxiety, my legs are bouncing and it seems like my heart is going to jump out of my chest. I can’t hurry fast enough into the sonogram room when they call my name out loud to come back. “I am here let’s hurry and find out. Can that be the first thing you look for please I really want to know?” I say very impatiently.As the doctor comes in the nurse turns to him and has a look on her face that I can’t seem to get out of my head. He looks at the sonogram and sits what seems like ever so slowly in his chair and I remember a tear beginning to trickle down the side of my face. Something was wrong. He turns the monitor toward him as to get a better look at the screen. Than I hear the news that no mother wants to hear when she is pregnant. The doctor says he wants me to go see a specialist because he sees an abnormality with the baby’s heart. I beg him to tell me what it could be with no avail. I leave this day with sadness surrounding me and I feel as all hope is lost.I wait nervously in the waiting room feeling tears whale up in my eyes, with all the ‘what ifs” going through my head. All I can do from breaking down is asking my husband to hold me. We are called in and we have to wait no longer Dr. Tabor is all ready waiting on us. The sonogram is confirmed the baby is missing the left ventricle of the heart and has fluid build up on the brain. Dr. Tabor stops in mid sentence and tells us that it is not too late to terminate the pregnancy if I should feel that this is too much to bare. My heart is broken I knew at this very instance that I didn’t want to loose my child. Dr. Tabor goes on to say that he wants to do an amneosynthesis to check for chromosomal abnormality. We agree and when it is done we leave there with 2 options. To terminate the pregnancy or to continue with the pregnancy with prayer that things may change. It was not till later on this day that I went to church and asked for prayer. It is there that I felt like all would be ok. I felt God’s presence surrounding me in a way I never felt before. My husband at my side holding me up my preacher at the other I felt at peace when something that had never happened to me happened. A sweet little old woman began to speak in a way that no one understood. We looked at her in amazement by the way she spoke in these tongues. And then it happened. I man came forth and made himself known and began the prophecy. It was spoken over me that God himself would take care of this situation and that I need not worry for this child is in the palm of his hands. I had to turn this over to him. “Do not be afraid, nor fret my child. You lean on me and let me have this. This burden is not for you to carry.” I laid it at the cross that night. I would worry no longer but I would continue to go to the to high risk specialist with hope in my heart On my very next visit to Dr. Tabor the nurse is amazed by what she sees. She has to call the doctor in to confirm. The fluid that surrounded the brain is down a considerable amount. I am filled with delight, joy and I began to cry once again. Only this time it would be with an over coming sensation of relief. The results from the amneo came back and all looks well. The doctor praised me for not even blinking an eye when it came to the decision of keeping the baby. Then I finally hear the news that I have waited to hear since my last visit with my regular doctor. My husband and I are being blessed with a baby girl. Each visit to the doctor we received better and better news. We praised God each time saying you are an awesome Father and we can’t thank you enough for the miracles you are working in our lives, for the love that you are pouring upon us. At one of the last visits before I gave birth to my daughter Dr. Tabor stands in shock as he looks at the screen and sees no fluid around the brain. He has no words to describe what has happened. He seemed so sure of the words he had told me so many times before that she would be born with pressure on her brain caused by this fluid and now it is no longer there. “For lack of a better word I am stund and speechless” he says to me with a look on his face of what is happening. He moves on to say that when she is born they will have to do surgery on her heart but this is a common procedure and all should go well. Once again I leave with a since of relief, hope and pride that my God works in many ways. My beautiful baby girl, Emyli, was born on April 4, 2002. I had longed to hear her cry out but there was nothing not a sound made. I prayed and cried out to God please make her cry I want to hear my child and in that instance Emyli cried hard and long. My love burst from my chest across the room and met with my child. They rushed her out and with a glimpse of her I knew again something was wrong. Hours go by and I hear nothing no one has come by to tell me what is going on. Her doctor finally makes an appearance in my door way and ask if he can sit. He comes in and tells me the horrifying news. Emyli has been born with no eyes but to everyone she looks like she is sleeping, the bone in her nose that allows her to breath has not separated, she is missing her pituitary gland and the left ventricle of her heart. She was born with septo optic dysplasia. I was broken. Three days later my precious daughter passed away. I cried and I begged God for an answer. “Why God!!! Why did you take her from me? Why did you lie to me and say that you would take care of her and that I didn’t need to worry God!!!! WHHHY!” I was crushed and angry. I felt as if God had let me down. At Emyli’s funeral many people came from all over. I had never seen some of these people. I kept asking myself “who are these people?” “Why are they here?” I wanted them to go away. They had no right to be there they didn’t know me or my child. I kept repeating it in my head over and over again “Just go away.” “My baby is here I see her, I want to hold her, smell her, and I want to take my baby home.” I became very withdrawn from God. I became so withdrawn that I wouldn’t attend church, pray, and I locked my bible away in hopes that I would never see it again. Soon I wouldn’t sleep in fear that I would have the dream that I had had over and over again. ‘A man calls out to me in a distance. When I turn I see him and he is holding my baby. He says to me “Becca I don’t understand if you want her fight for her just come take her from me.” I would walk forward. The faster I walked and then ran the further away he seemed. There was no end and no hope to catch him.’ I tried so hard and ran so fast that even when I woke up in the morning I would feel like I just ended a race. One year went by and I learned that my husband and I were expecting another child. I cried myself to sleep that night wondering how I can give birth to a healthy child and love this baby as much as I had missed my Emyli. In that night my dreams had changed. ‘A man calls out to me in a distance. When I turn I see him and he is holding my baby. He says to me “Becca I don’t understand if you want her fight for her just come take her from me.” Then I hear a voice a tiny little voice calling out “Mommy no don’t.” When I look to my left I see another man that shines so bright I can hardly see and walking hand in hand with a beautiful little girl. She again cries out “Mommy I am here. That is not me there in his arms I am here. I am with Jesus please Mommy don’t run anymore. I am here.” When I turn to walk away from the man that is standing in front of me he drops the blanket that has been in his arms and nothing is there just as my little girl had said.’ When I wake up that morning I knew that I have been chasing nothing and that my Emyli is where she belongs “sitting at the feet of our Lord”. I realize that God did do exactly as he said he would do. He did take my daughter and welcome her home. I also realized that he sent her here not just for me but for everyone to hear her story. I began to open the letters that were sent to me after her death and again reading them but this time listening to what they said. Letter after letter I read how Emyli had touched their heart and brought them closer to God. How just being at her funeral they asked God to be their hearts and number in their lives. I was touched and new that Emyli touched each and every person that was there that day. Her body had lain in a casket lifeless but her spirit had moved across the rows of people. God’s spirit along with hers and finally into people’s heart. I still have each letter that was written to me and I like to read over them now again to show me that God can move through anyone; even a child. This is my daughter Emyli’s story of how God’s love is shown through one baby girl.